Tuesday, November 8, 2005

Good Morning...

All is well in the world of El Jefe. I snooze in the comfy chair on the lawn of my Autumn Palace, in the Misty Mountains above Ciudad El Jefe, empty Cosmo glass on the table next to me, along with the ashtray bearing my dead cigar, and the plate with little bits of Gruyere cheese. The grounds are patrolled by a full regiment of El Jefe’s elite goombas, his personal guard, vigilantly watching over the sleeping Maximum Leader, all wearing their authentic 1920’s ice-cream suits, and carrying their genuine M 1928 Thompsons.

El Jefe’s loyal major domo/butler/fixer, Fritz, complete with monocle, has El Jefe’s next Cosmo ready when he wants it, along with all the Yankee papers and his breakfast, and will handle the phone if that insipid fool King Jacques calls for more advice.

Meanwhile, the protection money (er, taxes), flows into El Jefe’s treasury, the peasants are happily at work in their fields; the five different departments of Secret Police are all busy routing out the (fortunately few) depraved enemies of the Beloved Boss of Bosses. The factories are humming, the shops are full, the streets bustling, corporate profits obscene. Sunny skies, good pollution. At the Gas Station (corner of Avenue El and Jefe Street), super-unleaded (“Sky Jefe”) at the full-service pump is $.50 per gallon.

Someone is shaking my shoulder….is it El Jefe’s Principal Mistress, Marilyn Monroe, the Love Blonde…no, no NO….

Alas, the alarm clock, jerking El Jefe back to the all too mundane reality of working for a living. I’m working on an ERISA brief at work…deadly boring stuff. King Jacques needs to clap his rioters in a dungeon, make them read ERISA and the Internal Revenue Code to each other aloud…guaranteed to kill with sheer boredom almost instantly.

Speaking of the French, their cabinet seems to have at last gotten off the dime and declared a “state of emergency” under an old law dating from the Algerian War in the 1950’s. The rioters seem to be tiring: hopefully this is the case, because the police must be near utter exhaustion. On the subject of the French riots, be sure to read Theodore Dalrymple’s excellent article from City Journal in Autumn 2002 -- “The Barbarians at the Gates of Paris” (only recently brought to my attention) – which may be found via Real Clear Politics (link in the sidebar) or here.

Also worth reading: Carlos Alberto Montaner’s excellent little piece in Real Clear Politics on the silly Summit of the Americas. “Anti-Americanism Has Become Ideology.” The money quotes: “The Left today is nothing but circus and street violence” and “Latin America is the continent of the future and always will be.” You can find that one here.
Finally, go to Rush Limbaugh's site and check out the idea Rush has for President Saddam's legal defense team. Saddam's lawyers need to put Rush on the payroll, pronto. Rush has a whole speech written, built around the theme: "Bush lied and I want my country back !"

Elections today all over the US. To El Jefe the most interesting contest today involves the fate of four proposals by California Governor Ahhh…nold Schwarzenegger, in particular a campaign finance provision that would prevent labor unions from automatically using member dues for political activities unless they have the member’s consent; and another proposal limiting State spending.
Governor Schwarznegger’s proposals seem wise to me, and I assume the merit of them would be readily apparent to anybody who is not a raving lunatic. Evidently, not to the voters of nearly broke California – the Governor’s whole package seems headed for defeat. If I were the Governor, I’d resign if this happened. You can’t help drowning people who won’t swim.

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