Friday, June 6, 2008

Cars

El Jefe's presently looking at cars. The media's proclaiming the death of SUV's. I never have really wanted an SUV (save for the smaller Lexus), but all the vaporings from the Gaia worshipers about carbon footprints are making me want to give them another look. Yeah, they're expensive to maintain, and gas bugs me as much as the next guy, but they so offend all the right people.
Here's a fantasy. What I really, really want to do, just once, is get in a ginormous SUV -- maybe a big red Hummer, with NRA, pro-Bush and McCain stickers all over it; fill it up with six or seven kids all openly and notoriously smacking fast food; crank up a CD of Marine Corps band music; put on my Red State hat and drive slowly down the main drag in San Francisco or Berkeley (maybe right past Casa Pelosi) smoking a very smelly cigar.

3 comments:

louielouie said...

fantasy?
that is EJM I idea of a fantasy??????
something neat to do yeah, but a fantasy??
i would imagine an EJM I fantasy would involve this, this, and this. you might even consider this.
oh wait, those are my fantasies.
never mind.

louielouie said...

i feel predisposed to revise my previous post: read as, the secret police have been clubbing me over the head with a bottle of tres generations blanco, the bottle won't break, for the past two hours.
what i suggested as EJM I fantasy is in fact his reality.
therefore, the fantasy he described would be just that.
my bad.

it is a nice truck though.

you may want to consider this.
it could be a good second car for you.

El Jefe Maximo said...

Fantasy was perhaps a poor word choice.

Ya know, SWMBO was just saying that was my reality, but it probably better not be too much of my reality. . .lest I have to double what I pay the legions of fanatically loyal Goomba Guards.

As for the Bentley, it's spiff, but I don't know if it's got quite the carbon footprint, the utter, in your faceness of what I'm looking for on my invasion of the nether-regions of darkest Liberaldom. I mean, it might fit in too well out there with all the brie-heads driving Daddy's Bentley
with Obama stickers on it;while they are gabbing on their cell phones about evil Bushhitler and Darth Cheney breaking the thumbnails of those poor, innocent underprivileged ones in Guantanamo;and using
gobs of premium unleaded while heading to the save the gay-married endangered whales convention.